A masterclass presented in easy and alternative ways of getting trashed in style
Option 1
- Sit in the centre of the river
- Ignore rafts
- Get mashed by previously ignored raft
- Swim
Tried and tested by Tom, on Tryweryn, Holme Pierrpoint…
Option 2
- Go on ahead of main group so out of the line of site
- Don’t scout drop into tunnel weir Abyss
- Hit the tree you didn’t see
- Twist torso and attempt to paddle over
- Behold! Vertical pinning to be proud of
- Attempt to free self
- Attempt to bail
- Get stuck under rescue boat
- Bail, surface, breath
- Collide with awaiting branches
Certified on River Rother by Fritz
Option 3
- Buy stupidly small playboat
- Decide it isn’t fun in it and climb out
- Climb onto the edge of pourover
- Dive in
- Stay under as long as possible
- Get caught on trolley at the bottom
- Worry other paddlers by still staying under
- Emerge a token couple o’ hundred yards downstream in style, coughing and spluttering
- Inspect leg injury
No worries, Adam has tried this up Chertsy in order for our research
Option 4
- Paddle out of eddy onto small wave
- Flip upside down
- Head butt rock
- Reach bank and inspect helmet for gnarly dings
For more info see Ella, re. The Yat
Safety notes
- Do not attempt to breathe whilst submerged.
- Any of the above activities are not yet certified by British Canoeing legislation.
- Only the most stupid of paddlers should commence trials.